LEARN HOW TO RELAX, THEN DO IT

Copyright 2005 Daniel Sitter

Go,go,go. That is the pace of the world we live in. A century ago, life was less complex, more restful, operating at a much slower pace and certainly more peaceful. Today, prescriptions for dealing with depression, anxiety, stress and other similar ailments are at record highs. The need for these medicines did not even exist just a short while ago. What has happened to us? When our operating pace begins to infringe on our health, we need to learn how to step back and evaluate the road we are on before it is too late.

God rested on the seventh day. Obviously, God set an example that we should all observe as well. Do you feel that you may know something that He doesn't? Then why don't we rest, and take time to relax? Often it is while in the state of relaxation that we come up with our greatest thoughts, ideas, inventions and solutions to problems. I have noticed this on many occasions, especially while sleeping. I'll wake up and realize that my subconscious mind has been examining a certain problem while I slept and provided me with the solution when I awakened!

Often, we tend to think that we are too busy to take time for fun and relaxation. I submit that we need this time and that without it; we will ultimately reach a point of diminishing returns and simply burn out. As human beings, we are social creatures. We were designed for interaction with each other. We compete, cooperate, socialize, interact and love because we were designed to do so. If we work 60 – 70 hours per week, eliminating the weekend break and skipping vacations, we do not allow ourselves the necessary recharge that proper sleep, nutrition, relaxation, vacations and other personal time considerations afford us. Relaxation is not just for fun, it is necessary. If you don't believe that, you are simply kidding yourself and it will catch up with you sooner or later. You will soon become a person dependent upon sleep aids, gastro-intestinal and anxiety medicines, Excedrin and possible depression management drugs. Is that not too high a price for busy-ness?

Step back. Look at where you are. What is the cost of your current lifestyle? Is it a fair trade for those things that you do not possess? Have you sacrificed your health or your family for the sake of your career? No one, while lying on their death bed, would ever want to leave this world worrying about work or some aspect of their job. Most people would lament over the time that they squandered, the loved ones they ignored and the life that they might have had.

The good news is that it is not too late! It is never too late to change. Start right now. Put things in their proper perspective and prioritize the time you have available to you. Make proper time for sleep, as this rejuvenates you each day. When you work, work hard. Pour yourself in and maximize your output. At the end of the day, make your plan for the next day and then turn it off. Find something that you can get lost in, whether it is a sport, a cause, a leisure activity or activities and with equal passion as for work. Play hard too. Enjoy yourself and learn to relax. Make time for family and friends. Enjoy life. I suspect that these changes will make you even more productive when you work! It is a win-win for you.


About the author:
Daniel Sitter, author of the popular, award-winning e-book, Learning For Profit, teaches simple, valuable, step-by-step accelerated learning skills. Mr. Sitter has extensive experience in sales, training, marketing and personal development over a 25 year career. http://beta.blogger.com/


Circulated by Article Emporium

---

THE NEXT 3 SECRETS TO BOOSTING YOUR CREATIVITY

Copyright 2005 Inez Ng

Last month I gave you my first three secrets to how I boosted my own creativity. I hope you have been taking full advantage of the information. Now I will reveal three more secrets that will bring your creativity up another notch. Are you ready?

Unlearn your creativity blockers. Our parents and teachers taught us what they thought was good for us and what they thought we needed to succeed. And most of the time, they do a great job. However, we live in a society where conformity is valued, and so in preparing us to succeed here, they also imparted lessons that block our creative spirits. So, if you want to boost your creativity, it’s time to unlearn some of these.

1. It’s good to be practical and sensible

Starting from early childhood, most of us have been trained to be sensible and practical. Now it is time to unlearn some of these lessons, especially if you want to become freer in your creativity. When you are working on coming up with a creative new idea, or a creative solution to a problem, you must suspend whatever judgment you have been programmed to make regarding the practicality of the idea until much later. A corollary to this point is to also ignore judgments of others while you are in the process of creating.

Do you wonder if people questioned Edison’s sanity when he started working on the light bulb? What do you think would have happened if Edison paid attention to what others were telling him? I am convinced that Edison himself at times doubted the practicality of his idea. But he didn’t give in to that judgment, and because of that, we are not still sitting here reading by candlelight.

You don’t have to boost your creativity to the level of Edison’s. However, I would not be the least bit surprised if you’ve had some pretty darn good ideas in the past you dropped because you felt they were impractical. Start giving these ideas some time to incubate and see what happens.

2. Be serious and productive

In his book, Roger Von Oech wrote: “If necessity is the mother of invention, play is the father. Use it to fertilize your thinking.” Obviously then, the advice is to allow yourself to play with ideas.

Did you think you were more creative when you were a kid? I certainly thought that of myself. Recall the wonderful games and stories you came up with while playing with friends when you allowed your imagination to run free? It wasn’t hard to be creative then, was it?

I am not a computer game fan, but I have seen examples of some of them, and I believe the images in these games are definitely some of the most creative designs I have ever seen. There is just something about play that sparks our creativity. So, let yourself play with ideas and problems. Don’t ignore the fact that some of the most inventive ideas came from playing around with something and adapting it to a new application. So, take my advice, and spend time playing. You can be serious later.

3. Follow the rules

I am not advocating that you abandon all protocol and act irresponsibly. However, our training to automatically follow rules all the time is detrimental to the creative process.

Have you ever considered that most rules are made up in the first place and that the situation and conditions might have changed so much that certain rules don’t apply anymore? Question your assumptions and the rules you unconsciously apply to your situation and/or challenges and see what happens to your thinking.

What rules did Dell break? What about Google? If the leaders at these companies stuck with the old rules of business, would they be as successful today? So, don’t worry about breaking a few rules when you are focusing on creating something new and exciting.

This installment is focusing on unlearning lessons that block our creativity. I have one more installment in this series where I will share my last three secrets. Stay tuned. In the meantime, be silly, play and break a few rules.


About the author:
Are your business results suffering due to an ineffective leadership team ? Find out what coaching with Inez Ng can do for your leadership team at http://beta.blogger.com/You can receive helpful articles like this each month by joining her list. Want to know about saving time handling emails? Check out her ebook at http://beta.blogger.com/


Circulated by Article Emporium

---

ALCOHOLISM - WHAT SHOULD I KNOW ABOUT IT?

What is alcoholism?

Alcoholism is a disease that affects the part of the brain that controls your feelings, the way you make decisions, and the way you act. People with alcoholism cannot control how much they drink. What causes alcoholism?

Nobody knows what causes alcoholism. People with parents who have alcoholism have a greater chance of getting the disease. Alcoholism may be related to the things we learn when we are growing up. Alcoholism is not caused by a lack of will power or moral values.

How can I tell if I have alcoholism?

It is not easy to tell if you have alcoholism. You might drink socially at first, but over time the drinking can get out of control. Your family, friends, or doctor might notice it before you do. You might drink to help yourself go to sleep or deal with stress and anxiety. Over time, you need to drink more to feel the same way. As the drinking gets worse, you may have some of the following:

* Stomach ulcers

* Liver disease

* Mood problems, such as depression and irritability

* Trouble sleeping

* Problems with family and friends

* Problems at work.

You might have alcoholism if you have tried to quit drinking but were not able to stop. Alcoholism can make you do things you wouldn't do if you were sober. Some of these things can hurt other people, even the people you love.

Where can I get help for alcoholism?

Your doctor can help you find the right treatment program. You also can check with your health insurance company. Some insurance plans cover alcohol treatment only at certain places.

If you have been a heavy drinker for a long time, do not stop drinking suddenly. This can lead to serious withdrawal symptoms. What is withdrawal?

When you stop drinking, your body might find it hard with no alcohol. You might have some uncomfortable feelings. That is called withdrawal. You might feel anxious and confused or have trouble sleeping. If you get "the shakes" when you don't drink, or if you feel like you need to have a drink early in the day, you might need to take medicine when you stop drinking to help with the withdrawal. This is called detoxification (say:dee-tox-uh-fuh-kay-shun, or "detox," for short).

How can my doctor tell if I need detoxification?

Your doctor will ask you questions to see if you need to take medicine to stop drinking. It is important to be honest with your doctor about how much you drink and the kinds of drugs you take.

Can detoxification be done at home?

Yes, but only with close supervision from your doctor. You will need to have another person at home to help you take your medicine. If you have serious withdrawal symptoms or other medical problems, you might have to go to a hospital for detoxification. Tell your doctor if you had a seizure or got delirious when you tried to stop drinking before.

What happens after detoxification?

Detoxification is not enough to treat alcoholism. You should have counseling before and after detoxification. Counseling will help keep you from drinking again.

What about Alcoholics Anonymous?

Alcoholics Anonymous, or "A.A.," is a free support group for people with alcoholism. The people in A.A. help each other stay sober. Most communities have A.A. meetings, and most alcohol treatment programs tell their patients to go to these meetings.

Where can I get more information?

Your doctor

This information provides a general overview and may not apply to everyone. Talk to your family doctor to find out if this information applies to you and to get more information on this subject.

About the author:
Geoff Hugh http://beta.blogger.com/


Circulated by Article Grinder

---

PATH TO HEALING

It is within us to explore and draw upon our inner resources to heal. Some wounds are embedded so deeply that no amount of professional expertise can cure, much less heal.

A famous Yale surgeon says that as a surgeon, he cuts into the body, but he can not order the wound to heal. Ultimately, it through our efforts that healing can occur.

The path to healing is a personal choice. It is a path where you choose to piece together the fragments and make it” whole” again. It paves the way to self-discovery, to open the door to your inner self and experience inner harmony. And ultimately, come to meet the child within that has longed for your love, care and attention. The child within that is forgotten, pushed to the background, lurks in the shadows, but waits patiently.

What needs healing?

Childhood trauma:
The imprint of childhood experience is a powerful force. An expectant mother who lives through a stressful situation during pregnancy shares the burden with the unborn child.
Years ago, domestic matters were never discussed openly, especially issues about abuse, violence, neglect, abandonment and other related matters. Today, society is more aware of the potential or actual existence of abuse and violence in the home. Tragic that the innermost and safest sanctuary society depends upon can be the most dangerous.

These are issues that take its toll on the young victims. They grow up with wounds, carry them around like a heavy load on their shoulders. Some never get over their trauma, it turns up at the most unexpected moment to haunt them; yet, there are those who are lucky enough to confront it and use it to propel themselves to a healthier and successful relationships and life itself.

When love is a venom:
How many hearts have known pain all in the name of love. It invades lives from all walks of life, social status, add to that race or creed. No one wants to suffer pain, but it does happen. Healing a broken heart, picking up the pieces of broken hopes and dreams, suffer the betrayal, endure shattered self-image, re-live the haunting nightmares, the violation of one’s innermost being, soul and spirit.
The most traumatic of all is the violation that comes from those who are supposed to provide a nurturing environment to those who are entrusted to their care. All in the guise of love.

Grief
The loss of a loved one can be most devastating. Sometimes one did not have a chance to bid their last farewell. It was all too sudden. Or one passes away after a lingering illness, with the relief that the suffering is over comes the grief of the loss. At one point and time in one’s life, grief is a reality.

Guilt
Wrong turns, wrong choices, wrong decisions. We all take wrong turns, make wrong decisions and choices. This is a human trait that not even the saintliest of the saints has not experienced. We stumble, we fall, but many of us manage to get up and get on with life. The losses incurred at times are life-threatening, or at the cost of financial comfort and security or worst, relationships are threatened, lost or innocently or unconsciously sacrificed.

Wearing guilt on your face, in your heart, in your being invites negative vibrations and digs you deeper into the mire. Take a look at those sad eyes, the window of the soul, and you’ll know. However, this is not a dead-end!

Unfulfilled dreams and hopes
Live your dream,ride on the wings of hope; this will not always work out. One day you wake up and realize your dream never materialized and languish over the many years you spent trying to pursue that dream! In the meantime, time, opportunities and life passed you by. Hope can lead to disappointment- realize this. When all hopes are dashed, what have you got?

Path to healing:
Healing is a complex matter.
Who has never felt the pains of suffering, be it physical, mental, emotional, material and spiritual. Even our dear Mother Earth is in desperate need of healing from the abuse inflicted upon her through man’s recklessness, negligence and lack of respect.

There are avenues open to healing. One may choose to spend time with a professional, seek comfort from related groups, but always, healing has to start with one.

It is important to acknowledge the pain, to recognize the cause, to be able to integrate the fragmented pieces and be willing to take it to the next step to be “whole”again.

Healing extends beyond the physical state- when one hurts deeply, the spirit; the soul also bears the pain. It is a pain that comes in hauntingly in the dark of the night, it fills a once loving heart with venom, it could ravage a once healthy mind and body beneath a once beautiful and graceful soul is the mask of vengeance.

Blocks to healing:

But, sometimes, the path to healing is full of potholes. Indeed, the path is covered with blocks, where healing can not be accomplished, it almost out of reach. Impediments on the path:denial, apathy, self-absorption and self-indulgence, addiction, putting up walls and barriers, busy-bee syndrome, compartmentalizing, isolation, withdrawal from society, cynicism, loss of faith, trust and compassion, self-pity, poor –me syndrome, anger, fear of getting hurt again, martyr complex, neurosis or psychosis, aggressive/ oppressive, confrontational, guilt complex, resignation

Disclaimer:
Sometimes, we hurt those we love most deeply; likewise, we bear the pain they cause. This is a personal essay, it does not in any way deny the importance of seeking professional help when indicated. However, it is acknowledged that one must want to heal, must understand what needs healing, must be willing to accept the need to heal - all the expert advise and professional help can not be effective otherwise.

About the author:
Bonnie Moss pursues her dream of writing and other interests in her retirement. She offers inspirational topics on spirituality and a variety of inspirational subjects.
Visit her website: http://beta.blogger.com/


Circulated by Article Highway

---

7 WAYS TO SOOTHE YOUR SHYNESS

Copyright 2005 Uncommon Knowledge Ltd

Shy people instinctively know that they are missing out. Shyness equals lost opportunities, less pleasure and fewer social connections. Shyness can be crippling but there are tried and tested ways to make it a thing of the past.

When I was fifteen I was shy. I recall an attractive girl attempting to engage me in conversation. My shyness made me focus on me instead of her. I heard my own voice but not hers and I thought about what I was trying to say instead of what she was trying to say.

The formula for shyness is "too much focus on the self" plus anxiety. To make it even more unpleasant, sometimes when you are feeling shy you experience physical sensations which ‘hijack’ your calm logical self.

My pulse raced, my mouth dried up and I felt like the village idiot! I couldn’t think what to say so I said nothing apart from making barely audible grunting noises! Cary Grant eat your heart out! When I detected pity in her eyes (or was it contempt, or boredom) I mumbled my excuse and got out of there. I hated being shy and was determined to change it.

How shyness is developed and maintained

Shyness really is a combination of social anxiety and social conditioning. To overcome shyness you need to learn to relax socially. This enables you to direct your attention away from yourself and gives you the space to practice certain conversational skills. In most cases, the heightened emotions of socializing when young simply condition the sufferer to respond to social events with fear, instead of excitement and pleasure.

Relaxed socializing is so pleasurable, not to say productive, but it is an advantage denied to many until they learn to relax. To start reducing your own shyness, I want you to absorb the following tips and ideas and start to put them into practice:

1) Think about the way you feel and behave around familiar people you are comfortable and spontaneous around. It’s that feeling transferred to new people and situations that equates to your emerging social confidence.

2) Focus your attention away from yourself. Sure, you can think a little bit about how you are coming across, but if all your focus is on your own words and feelings then you might as well be by yourself. Notice what other people are wearing and make a mental note, listen to their conversation, imagine where they might live, make a point of remembering names. Not only does this give you more to talk about, it also ‘dilutes’ social anxiety leaving you feeling calmer.

3) Ask people open questions. Many people like to talk about themselves and will find you interesting if you find them interesting. Ask questions that require more than a ‘yes’/’no’ response such as ‘What do you like about this place?’ rather than: ‘Do you like this place?’ Once they’ve answered use ‘add-on’ questions connected to the first such as: ‘What other places do you like in this city…?’ Next you can express your views. This is a great way to get the conversation going. If the conversation doesn’t ‘take’ then no matter, you’ve done your bit.

4) Stop trusting your imagination so much! Have you ever had an imaginary picture in your mind of a holiday destination only to arrive and find the reality is different from the way you had imagined? That’s how reliable imagination is. Stop imagining what others think. I do lots of public speaking and I’ve long since stopped trying to second guess what others think of me - it's just too painful. Besides, what a person thinks about you has a lot more to do with who they are than who you are.

5) Stop using ‘all or nothing’ thinking. The ‘completely this/completely that’ style of thought occurs when you are emotional. People who are depressed, angry or anxious see reality in terms of differing extremes, simplistic all or nothing terms. An angry person is ‘right’ and you are ‘wrong’; the depressed person feels like a ‘failure’ while others are a ‘success’. In reality, life is composed of infinite gray areas. So stop fearing that you might say the ‘wrong’ thing! Or that people will ‘hate’ you. Once you start to relax more socially you’ll notice much less black or white thinking because anxiety actually causes you to think in all or nothing terms.

6) Take your time. You don’t have to blurt things out. Ask questions and if questions are asked of you can take time to consider your response (within reason). Don’t just blurt out what you think might be the ‘right’ answer. A slow answer is a relaxed answer.

7) Finally, use hypnotic rehearsal. Hypnosis is the quickest way to change your instinctive/emotional response to any situation. Only think about meeting others when your mind and body is relaxed. This conditions you to associate relaxation with being around new people. In fact you’ll find that when you relax deeply enough often enough whilst hypnotically rehearsing being comfortable around others you’ll reach the point where you just can’t be shy any more! This is what I call a ‘happy inability!’

I now love meeting new people and suspect that my current social confidence would be unrecognizable to my fifteen year old self.


About the author:
Former 'shy guy' Mark Tyrrell is Creative Director of Uncommon Knowledge Ltd and regularly demonstrates his lack of shyness to audiences of hundreds. He teaches people how to use hypnosis and sensible psychology to lower anxiety and improve confidence. He has helped create a hypnosis session so that others can overcome shyness as he did: http://www.hypnosisdownloads.com/downloads/self_improvement/overcoming_shyness.html


Circulated by Article Highway

---

A SYSTEM OF SELF-GROWTH AND DISCOVERY

Author: Sim

This article is a brief description of the spiritual path that I am walking upon.

I think for any path to be feasible there must be certain ways of increasing our understandings and realisations. In my case, I was taught how to interpret dream and meditation symbols. The key main components of my path are :

1. Meditation2. Dreams and vision interpretation.

Many other modalities, act as secondary supports along the journey. But the crux of the path essentially lies in consistent meditation and dream/vision interpretations. It is perhaps possible not to meditate, provided we remain sensitive to incoming-intuitions and other means of receiving insights and self-discoveries. Pendulum reading does play a part in filling some of the roles performed by meditational vision interpretation, but it is certainly not as flexible. This is because the readings that we get from pendulums are limited by the type of charts we use. In another word, visions can have infinite variations, whereas pendulum charts can only give us answers within their range of options.

Additionally, Reiki attunements helped in increasing my sensitivity to energies.

I simply cannot emphasize more on the role dream/vision interpretation plays in self-growth acceleration. It is very effective in deepening our understandings and in transforming ourselves.

Prior to knowing how to interpret dreams, progress was slow for me. Dream interpretation significantly opened up new ways of receiving detailed information essential for my continued self-growth. I don't think there are any hard and fast rules to self-discovery. Living Life itself is the path.

However, I do believe in practice and consistency, if we were to achieve any desirable results. I have been a meditator for many years... It was about 5-6 years ago that I discovered that I am at times receiving visions/images/insights in my mind that educated me about certain things. Often these visions revealed only what was understandable by me at any given moment of my journey. It was at this beginning stage of vision-receiving, that I met a highly Enlightened Teacher who taught me the current method that included dream interpretation. I am truly grateful to that Teacher.

Along my path, there were at times, what appeared to be past-lives feelings surfacing onto my conscious mind. These feelings were mostly traumatic, but realising them allowed me to understand the reason of my present life fears. Because of the potentially shocking and at times unpleasant experiences of past-life emotional re-living, I strongly feel that only one who is focused on progressing spiritually attempt to uncover past life experiences. Past life uncovering must be treated with respect.

Well, this is my system of practice in a nutshell. As you can see, the path is quite flexible in the sense that it is fully integrated into my life experiences and it does not really present itself as a separate endeavour. Also, each individual path will be unique and different from others. This is mainly because, each one of us, have different issues and areas that needed addressing.

I recognise that many different types of path can lead to similarly desirable results. Perhaps, the external expressions of different paths often belies similar dynamics under the differing facade.

The author is a guy living in the Far East. He runs a self-growthresource site at http://www.dreamdatum.com/.He is also the creator of a Dream Interpretation Software called Dream DiaryAssistant.
Article Source: http://www.articlerich.com/

HOW TO BE MORE ATTRACTIVE: GOTTA HAVE SENSE OF HUMOR!

Author: Pick Up Guide

Men having great sense of humor ranked number three as being a personality trait that attracts women on survey results conducted by several magazines. Topping the survey is physical appearance and number two, financial stability.

Laughing can be very beneficial to one’s health, according to researchers. And a great sense of humor, which creates laughter, can make a lot of difference specially when dating women. A lot of women see a guy with a great sense of humor very attractive mainly because it makes the conversation a lot lighter, it makes them laugh and dating a man who is very serious in his outlook in life makes the conversation heavy and can become very boring, according to studies, among two hundred college students.

The same study indicated that women like intelligent men and a great sense of humor is linked to intelligence, as a man with wits can think fast, able to produce a joke instantly that is suitable to the situation is clever indeed and is no “non-sense”.

Indeed, “laughter is the best medicine”. Considerable research and studies have proved that laughter and humor benefits the body as well as the emotion. It boost the “immune system”, reduces stress, relax the muscles, “lowers blood pressure”, increases pain tolerance and hastens the process of healing. No wonder women feel so good being with a man with great sense of humor!

Men having good sense of humor are always cheerful. To them, each day is sunny. Should dark clouds appear, they depend on laughter, confident that all problems will pass and instead of being discouraged, they move on with so much hope.

Even if a man is not really that attractive physically, but with a great sense of humor, women are usually drawn to him. Why? Because according to most women in a survey result, they are more at ease with these types of men, as they make the women laugh and as a result, let them feel that they can open up almost anything; a man with a great sense of humor encourages the woman to be confident.

Generally, men with a sense of humor have so much spunk in life. Not only can they come up with a joke unrehearsed, but also can take a joke.

Here are ways to sharpen and improve your sense of humor:

1. Encourage an environment of laughter and humor in the relationship that you have by concentrating on the comical or funny side of things and delighting in the laughter that they bring to mind. Then, you will soon begin to see humor in things that you do, including the problems that may come and handle them without stress in your relationship.

2. When you feel that you do not laugh that much and you feel that you should correct this, associate yourself with fun loving and humorous people. Try to go to happy places and you and your partner can engage in fun and lively activities.

3. Try laughing at yourself and at the situations around you. Many individuals are not able to laugh because they are insecure of themselves and because of personal fears. Often, they are scared to look silly in front of others and give the impression to be foolish, according to psychiatrists. It is essential to become conscious that all people make or commit mistakes and it is when you put up a pleasant laugh can make such mistake appear human.

4. Read on humorous books and collect clean jokes. Then when the need arises, there is always a joke ready to lighten up someone else’s day!

5. So as to neutralize disagreement in your relationship, use humor. When things in your relationship get uptight, “self deprecating humor” can lighten things. “Self-deprecating humor” encourages humility and nurtures courage, needed to take off the mask that one wears when insecure and uncovers one's weakness to his partner. Having sense of humor in your relationship will add so much zest, help it become rewarding and can help both partners see life in a different perspective. A more carefree, cheerful and positive relationship will prosper as a result of a happy disposition between couples.

For more great tips on dating and picking up women, check out our free dating articles at Pick Up Success Guide.
Article Source: http://www.articlerich.com/